i love how almost EVERY craigslist ad for a used piece of musical equipment says "used maybe twice." then they sell something at about 80% of what they paid for it instead of the normal 50-60% for used gear.
seriously? you "may" have used this twice? you spent $1400 on a brand new Gibson Les Paul, and you only played it twice (possibly)? are you stoned all the time, a drunk, or a narcoleptic? are you so far gone that you can't remember if you used this brand new piece of "awesome" gear once, twice, or three times? or, perhaps you've had it for a year, used it all over the place, in a "smoky studio environment," gigged with it at a bunch of different clubs, oh and don't mind the tears in the case, that was from when you brought it from your car to your house the day you bought it. you slipped on a pile of guitar picks in your foyer and it LIGHTLY slammed into your Eddie Van Halen statue replica. bullshit.
from now on, i'm only buy things that have been used "like three times."
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
today's rant.. 2.19.2013 - 97.5 HFS
so, radio listeners, what's up with the quality of songs on the new HFS at 97.5? it sounds like crappy mp3 encodings, or even sirius/xm quality. and furthermore, does anyone else agree that sirius sounds like crap? i don't know if there's an HD version or what, but i think if you have to pay a monthly fee for radio it should at least sound better than an mp3 that i downloaded off a bulletin board in 1996.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
weatherby as lincoln: a grandmother's hallucination?
let me start off by saying that people who type in all lower case (besides pronouns) are of higher intelligence than those who do not, with the sole exception of me.
my grandmother once told me that our family is related to Abraham Lincoln, through the Branch family on her mother's side, and so on and so forth, from him to me, just like that. i've wanted to believe her since i was a young child, and repeated this fact over and over again whenever the name was brought up; mostly i got strange looks and passive nods. i kept vocalizing the idea thinking, well, i'm tall enough, and (later) i could probably do a great Lincoln on halloween. and why shouldn't anyone believe me?
***
i first began to realize the ridiculousness of my claim when my grandmother passed away. when they cleared out her belongings and effects from her room, they found in a clothes hamper underneath a few dirty shirts a terrifying stash of empty pill bottles marked with her name and the name of a powerful mood enhancer known to cause hallucinations in some users. no one knows how or why she had the prescription for so long, but some things began to come clear to me.
***
on my 17th birthday she kept me on the phone for 30 minutes telling me that i should be a doctor, insisting that the only people in my family worth spitting on were doctors and that i should probably study science in college instead of English. i am terrible in all sciences, always have been, and kept telling her that i've wanted to study English since i started reading. she acknowledged the sound of my voice, but did not hear what i said... that same year my cousin was busted in his trailer with a meth lab and 2 kilos of weed (and a wife and child) and she called the FBI in to investigate saying "He was set up!" thankfully for him they never came... and on a regular basis she called a line at the white house to let the president know about the poor job he was doing; i'm assuming she was never patched through to the oval office.
***
i can't really appreciate my grandmother. i don't feel ashamed for thinking it, but it doesn't rest so easily on my conscience that i'm not a bit ashamed for saying it. she was a strange woman, a self-purported adventurer and traveler, but also an outspoken racist with no real awareness of the hurt her offhand n-words could cause. she was by accent a deep south racist, though she hailed from Ohio and had a short list of entertainers and intellectuals she classified as "the good ones." once on a trip to Washington, D.C. she made my grandfather smear mud on their Mississippi license plates so no one would be able to see the markings of the deep south on their vehicle and smash their windows. i see now that she was embarrassed more than anything; for most of her married life she lived on a street called Plantation Blvd. that was long before i was born. by the time i was old enough to realize what she was, the staunch racism surrounding her mixed with the sticky Mississippi summers and chased with a bottle of pills must have boiled her brains pretty good.
***
i don't know why anyone does anything, or how people's beliefs and convictions are shaped and held on to, or what makes one idea better than another. and today, after photoshopping my face onto a pic of old Abe, thinking about my crazy grandmother again, and writing this blog, i realize that i will never truly know those things about myself either. i'm okay with that. as far as being related to the Gettysburg addresser, who cares if it's not true? i am tall enough, and if it will make mimi's troubled soul rest any easier i'll keep believing no matter how dumb it makes me.
also, my face fit eerily well on Abe's, and that's pretty damn cool.
my grandmother once told me that our family is related to Abraham Lincoln, through the Branch family on her mother's side, and so on and so forth, from him to me, just like that. i've wanted to believe her since i was a young child, and repeated this fact over and over again whenever the name was brought up; mostly i got strange looks and passive nods. i kept vocalizing the idea thinking, well, i'm tall enough, and (later) i could probably do a great Lincoln on halloween. and why shouldn't anyone believe me?
***
i first began to realize the ridiculousness of my claim when my grandmother passed away. when they cleared out her belongings and effects from her room, they found in a clothes hamper underneath a few dirty shirts a terrifying stash of empty pill bottles marked with her name and the name of a powerful mood enhancer known to cause hallucinations in some users. no one knows how or why she had the prescription for so long, but some things began to come clear to me.
***
on my 17th birthday she kept me on the phone for 30 minutes telling me that i should be a doctor, insisting that the only people in my family worth spitting on were doctors and that i should probably study science in college instead of English. i am terrible in all sciences, always have been, and kept telling her that i've wanted to study English since i started reading. she acknowledged the sound of my voice, but did not hear what i said... that same year my cousin was busted in his trailer with a meth lab and 2 kilos of weed (and a wife and child) and she called the FBI in to investigate saying "He was set up!" thankfully for him they never came... and on a regular basis she called a line at the white house to let the president know about the poor job he was doing; i'm assuming she was never patched through to the oval office.
***
i can't really appreciate my grandmother. i don't feel ashamed for thinking it, but it doesn't rest so easily on my conscience that i'm not a bit ashamed for saying it. she was a strange woman, a self-purported adventurer and traveler, but also an outspoken racist with no real awareness of the hurt her offhand n-words could cause. she was by accent a deep south racist, though she hailed from Ohio and had a short list of entertainers and intellectuals she classified as "the good ones." once on a trip to Washington, D.C. she made my grandfather smear mud on their Mississippi license plates so no one would be able to see the markings of the deep south on their vehicle and smash their windows. i see now that she was embarrassed more than anything; for most of her married life she lived on a street called Plantation Blvd. that was long before i was born. by the time i was old enough to realize what she was, the staunch racism surrounding her mixed with the sticky Mississippi summers and chased with a bottle of pills must have boiled her brains pretty good.
***
i don't know why anyone does anything, or how people's beliefs and convictions are shaped and held on to, or what makes one idea better than another. and today, after photoshopping my face onto a pic of old Abe, thinking about my crazy grandmother again, and writing this blog, i realize that i will never truly know those things about myself either. i'm okay with that. as far as being related to the Gettysburg addresser, who cares if it's not true? i am tall enough, and if it will make mimi's troubled soul rest any easier i'll keep believing no matter how dumb it makes me.
also, my face fit eerily well on Abe's, and that's pretty damn cool.
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Friday, March 16, 2012
news 3.16.2012
i'm keeping this one short. busy day at work today.
george clooney is a good dude in my book. but i'm sure when he "got arrested" today the cops dropped him off a the airport so he could catch a plane back to LA. maybe that didn't happen, but i'm sure he's not going to get into any real trouble. he can pay a fine with ease.
the Kegs & Eggs on DC101 sounded like ass. worst sound mix ever. i don't even think they were streaming the mix from the mixing board, i think it was just coming through elliott's mic.
the whole "coolest thing ever" contest by 98 Rock is pretty awful. a few of the things i heard were "sluts vs. burning stuff" and "single mothers vs. [something meaningless]." pretty sexist, chauvinistic, and awful. oh well, what can you expect from a leprechaun, an ogress, and their moronic fans.
george clooney is a good dude in my book. but i'm sure when he "got arrested" today the cops dropped him off a the airport so he could catch a plane back to LA. maybe that didn't happen, but i'm sure he's not going to get into any real trouble. he can pay a fine with ease.
the Kegs & Eggs on DC101 sounded like ass. worst sound mix ever. i don't even think they were streaming the mix from the mixing board, i think it was just coming through elliott's mic.
the whole "coolest thing ever" contest by 98 Rock is pretty awful. a few of the things i heard were "sluts vs. burning stuff" and "single mothers vs. [something meaningless]." pretty sexist, chauvinistic, and awful. oh well, what can you expect from a leprechaun, an ogress, and their moronic fans.
Thursday, March 15, 2012
my take on today's news: 3.15.2012
i got some news today..
RE: the Kony video is getting flak from Ugandans--
i'm not sure who i agree with on this one. i haven't seen the video, but i don't really think that matters. if Ugandans themselves don't like the idea of the video, a logical reaction to that would be to side with them because they are the ones in the middle of it. but i also know that being so close to something can skew your perception of it, especially if your already inclined to dislike Americans and their meddling ways (see: the rest of the world). spreading the word about this asshole is all well and good, but i have to agree that selling t-shirts and bracelets with Kony's likeness on it is pretty messed up. it is exactly like Africans selling t-shirts with Bin Laden's face on it (their words, not mine). so in conclusion, the intention of the video is fine, but stop selling the merch guys.
RE: HBO's "Luck" is going off the air--
wow, who is surprised by that one? Nick Nolte can barely speak, horse racing is a joke, and the seedy underbelly of that part of society is hardly as scandalous as the show would make it out to be.
RE: Motley Crue is touring with KISS this summer--
if you're into that sort of thing, i feel sorry for you and the people around you.
RE: David Lee Roth stopped a concert to yell at some dudes for fighting--
see the comment directly above.
RE: REM's guitarist may sing on his new solo album and only release it on vinyl--
i.. hope the album is decent, but i will never hear it because i'm not buying an expensive record by someone whose former band's music i only moderately like.
----------
yup. that's it.
-craig
RE: the Kony video is getting flak from Ugandans--
i'm not sure who i agree with on this one. i haven't seen the video, but i don't really think that matters. if Ugandans themselves don't like the idea of the video, a logical reaction to that would be to side with them because they are the ones in the middle of it. but i also know that being so close to something can skew your perception of it, especially if your already inclined to dislike Americans and their meddling ways (see: the rest of the world). spreading the word about this asshole is all well and good, but i have to agree that selling t-shirts and bracelets with Kony's likeness on it is pretty messed up. it is exactly like Africans selling t-shirts with Bin Laden's face on it (their words, not mine). so in conclusion, the intention of the video is fine, but stop selling the merch guys.
RE: HBO's "Luck" is going off the air--
wow, who is surprised by that one? Nick Nolte can barely speak, horse racing is a joke, and the seedy underbelly of that part of society is hardly as scandalous as the show would make it out to be.
RE: Motley Crue is touring with KISS this summer--
if you're into that sort of thing, i feel sorry for you and the people around you.
RE: David Lee Roth stopped a concert to yell at some dudes for fighting--
see the comment directly above.
RE: REM's guitarist may sing on his new solo album and only release it on vinyl--
i.. hope the album is decent, but i will never hear it because i'm not buying an expensive record by someone whose former band's music i only moderately like.
----------
yup. that's it.
-craig
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
my take on today's news: 3.14.2012 (98 rock morning show rant)
happy pi day!
i didn't hear too much news this morning. i heard something that i was going to make fun of, but now i don't remember.
oh, i DID hear 98 rock talking about Billy Corgan's interview at SXSW when he basically said alternative rock music sucks right now and that people need to focus more on writing good albums instead of shoving out a single every few months. anyway, as usual, 98 rock misquoted something BC said. josh spiegel said one of the points BC made was that you can "light yourself on fire" to become popular "on YouTube." that's actually the exact opposite of what he said. he said you can't light yourself on fire or get drunk and jump around anymore, because people aren't buying it. it's a schtick and won't last. but in Josh's defense, he didn't write out the quote (and he's a huge SP fan).
Mickey started getting all whiny and saying BC is a douche, he's bitter, blah blah blah. he asked Amelia to name 3 SP songs and she named like 6. i mean yeah, BC says things that are hard to swallow coming from someone who saw success in the 90s and now can't write a hit to save his life. it's easy to say "he's just bitter because he's not relevant anymore." it's also easy to demonize anyone who says anything negative about the perfect little society we live in. but the rest of the DJs stuck up for little Billy, which i was pretty happy about. and Mickey, as douchey as Billy Corgan can sometimes be, he, like you, is a decent human being who has strong opinions on the thing he cares about most. i thought the interview was insightful, and kind of a kick in the ass to people like me who want to make music for a living.
i generally don't have a problem with the 98 rock morning crew (i like them as much as one can like morning radio DJs), but please guys, please stop saying things that aren't true. a few weeks ago Amelia was talking about Golden West Cafe in Hampden and said and hipsters suck blah blah blah, she liked some dish though, and that it's closed on Mondays. well the dish she likes isn't on the menu, and it's definitely open on Mondays (and everyone sucks, not just hipsters). i mean talk smack about a place you actually go to, but if you haven't been there for 5 years you might want to check up on your facts.
it may sound nitpicky of me, but they say things that are wrong a LOT. once in a while would be fine, but if you're going to fill the generally-ignorant masses with information every morning that they will no doubt adopt as gospel, you should make sure it's the truth.
also, Bosley rules.
i didn't hear too much news this morning. i heard something that i was going to make fun of, but now i don't remember.
oh, i DID hear 98 rock talking about Billy Corgan's interview at SXSW when he basically said alternative rock music sucks right now and that people need to focus more on writing good albums instead of shoving out a single every few months. anyway, as usual, 98 rock misquoted something BC said. josh spiegel said one of the points BC made was that you can "light yourself on fire" to become popular "on YouTube." that's actually the exact opposite of what he said. he said you can't light yourself on fire or get drunk and jump around anymore, because people aren't buying it. it's a schtick and won't last. but in Josh's defense, he didn't write out the quote (and he's a huge SP fan).
Mickey started getting all whiny and saying BC is a douche, he's bitter, blah blah blah. he asked Amelia to name 3 SP songs and she named like 6. i mean yeah, BC says things that are hard to swallow coming from someone who saw success in the 90s and now can't write a hit to save his life. it's easy to say "he's just bitter because he's not relevant anymore." it's also easy to demonize anyone who says anything negative about the perfect little society we live in. but the rest of the DJs stuck up for little Billy, which i was pretty happy about. and Mickey, as douchey as Billy Corgan can sometimes be, he, like you, is a decent human being who has strong opinions on the thing he cares about most. i thought the interview was insightful, and kind of a kick in the ass to people like me who want to make music for a living.
i generally don't have a problem with the 98 rock morning crew (i like them as much as one can like morning radio DJs), but please guys, please stop saying things that aren't true. a few weeks ago Amelia was talking about Golden West Cafe in Hampden and said and hipsters suck blah blah blah, she liked some dish though, and that it's closed on Mondays. well the dish she likes isn't on the menu, and it's definitely open on Mondays (and everyone sucks, not just hipsters). i mean talk smack about a place you actually go to, but if you haven't been there for 5 years you might want to check up on your facts.
it may sound nitpicky of me, but they say things that are wrong a LOT. once in a while would be fine, but if you're going to fill the generally-ignorant masses with information every morning that they will no doubt adopt as gospel, you should make sure it's the truth.
also, Bosley rules.
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